Senior Software Engineer
Software Engineerus seniorus
[ Illustration ]
Adult specimen, shown
mid-standup, pointing
at a dashboard.
Plumage: hoodie,
worn at elbows.
Field Marks
- Distinguished by calm demeanor during incident reviews — possibly philosophy degree-related
- Often observed with multiple monitors and a lukewarm coffee
- Plumage shifts color with each migration (Java → Kotlin, XML → Compose)
- Call: a soft "the build is green" heard most mornings
- Migratory pattern includes a notable 20,000-mile southward route (2010–2011)
| Kingdom | Technologia |
| Phylum | Codifera |
| Class | Mobilia & Webilia |
| Order | Agile-formes |
| Family | Kotlinidae |
| Genus | Software |
| Species | Engineerus seniorus |
Habitat & Range
PORTLAND, OR
PRIOR RANGE
MIGRATION ROUTE: AZ → ARGENTINA
Currently resident in Portland, Oregon, where it has nested since relocating from prior ranges in Wisconsin, Virginia, and Arizona. Prefers open-plan habitats with standing desks and reliable Wi-Fi. A notable subpopulation undertakes an irregular long-distance migration through Central and South America, returning with field notes published as "Anxiety Across the Americas."
Behavioral Notes — Observed Activity by Season
2003–2004
Juvenile stage. First observed foraging in the dairy-industry CRM systems of Green Bay, Wisconsin (Land O'Lakes, White Clover Dairy). Establishes early territory in .NET environments.
2007–2010
Sub-adult stage. Maintains a large communal structure (online classroom platform) housing over 400,000 students at University of Phoenix. Demonstrates capacity for sustained, large-scale upkeep.
2010–2011
Migratory event (rare). Departs known range entirely. Travels 20,000 miles solo by motorcycle from Arizona to Argentina over 8 months. Returns with plumage changed and a published account of the journey.
2016–2017
Re-established territory. Builds a nest (Android app, "Load Board") from raw materials at DAT Solutions; constructs supporting Node.js infrastructure.
2017–2019
Dominance display. At Cvent, leads a React Native pilot and ascends to "Tech Lead" status within six months — an unusually rapid promotion for the species. Also observed hosting gatherings (meetups) for other engineers.
2019–2024
Mature adult, peak activity. At New Relic, leads a full migration of 50+ screens from Java/XML to Kotlin/Jetpack Compose for the mobile observability platform. CI pipeline observed to be calmer following this event.
2024–present
Current activity. At eBay, forages in item discovery and offer management, sales analytics, and coupon systems. Increasingly observed in symbiosis with AI tooling (GitHub Copilot, Cline, Claude Code).
Diet
- Coffeestaple, year-round
- Pull requestsdaily
- Legacy codeopportunistic
- Stack tracesas needed
- Standup updatesmorning ritual
Identification & Credentials
Confirmed via dual certification: B.S. Computer Science and B.S. Philosophy, Saint Norbert College (2000–2004). The philosophy credential is reportedly most visible during incident reviews.
Status: Actively Shipping
Population trend: stable to increasing. Frequently observed responding to recruiter messages within the hour — considered "also unusual" by field researchers.